We are trying to change a story from 3rd person / Narrator to 1st person, We had to
Choose a fariy tale welve lernt so we can rewite it.
Think from Different characters point of veiw. I Selected Shrek.
Use words to discribe my character Shrek. Huge, Mean, Lonley.
Add the pronouns i need to use for 1st persons perspective – I, We, Me, My, Our.
Check we have the main events from the story add numbers in order to remined
me To use paragraphs.
Then I had to write the open paragraph.
Here is my frist paragraph:
Once upon a time there was three donkey gruffs Falisha the littlist donkey, Fergus the medium donkey and
Ferkal the Oldist donkey always looking out for his sibblings but one day they all suddenley ran out of Grass
Falisha felt sad, ferkal was trying to remember somthing, somthing that he saw trying to get past the canyon
All right ferkal said out loud Let set a track to middle of the canyon. It took Two whole days but they made it
They all chered But falisha noticed there was two sets of grass because there was a strem splitting the one in halve
But there were a bridge in the middle…
Afternoon Caleb, thank you for sharing your first paragraph. I like how you changed 3 Billy Goats Gruff to Donkeys. Remember you were also supposed to be one of the donkeys. (So the story shouldn’t start with ‘Once upon a time’).
Kia ora Caleb. Nice job on explaining the learning that you were doing for your readers. Like Mrs Mundy said, don’t forget to use the pronouns you listed to make sure you’re in the story. I’m also wondering if more punctuation, like full stops and speech marks, would help your readers out?